One of the biggest stressors in my life right now is where to send kids to school next year. Although I LOVE the school Faith is attending this year, we can’t afford to send two children there and Wilson will be entering kindergarten next year. We have decided to not send Faith to Covenant Day next year (which she doesn’t know yet). We may not even tell her until this summer when we finally know where they will be going. We have sent Faith to the Rolls Royce of schools and I am afraid that it will be hard to find that community and love of a school again. I know that it is time to say “goodbye” to Covenant Day and I am prepared to do so, but it is still a hard thing to do.
In Charlotte, there are endless options for schooling: very expensive private schools, expensive Christian schools, less expensive Christian schools, charter, magnet, and public schools. So many choices that it is overwhelming. Here are what we are choosing between for next year….
Option 1: I have entered both Wilson and Faith into the lottery at Union Academy in Monroe, NC. This is a charter school that is about twenty minutes east of us. I have no idea what the chances of getting in are. Wilson has a better chance for kindergarten, but Faith’s chances are even slimmer, assuming that there is even an opening for second grade. I won’t know if they get in until March 9th when they have the lottery.
Option 2: Metrolina Christian Academy. It is a Christian school in Indian Trail, NC that is about half the price of Covenant Day. We can get both kids in for what it cost us to send Faith to CDS, however, we are still paying for private school. As I have written before, I have anxiety about paying for school and often compare what we could have done with that money to what I got for schooling. Still, what we paid for Faith to be happy these last two years has been priceless. She has had small class sizes and amazing teachers that love her as a child of God. I was talking to another mom about how my cousin Maddie is very set in her faith and how she talks about it at the public high school that she attends now that she is out of private Christian school. We compared Maddie to my friend’s daughter who has been in the public school since second grade. She said, “I think [my daughter] has been in the public school too long and has learned to pretty much just keep her mouth shut about her faith.” That saddens me. I don’t want my children to get beat down into submission and keep their mouths shut when asked about their faith and belief in God just because no one else believes it or because it goes unspoken. Hence, my dilemma about spending the money and sending them to a Christian school.
Our last, but not least option, is to send them to the public school. The only problem with this solution is that we don’t know which school district we will be moving in to. We won’t know that answer until after we sell this house and buy another house (which is a completely different source of stress all together). There are many, many great public schools in our area, so this would not be a bad choice either, I hope. It is just the most vague choice since we don’t know where we are moving….or even IF we are moving. It depends on how quickly our house sells.
As Tom has said, “We can’t make a bad choice.” We are blessed to have the chance to make such a decision. Over the past few months I have prayed about this decision and I feel like God has been saying, “Wait.” So I have waited. I have put this decision on the back burner and I have done nothing – I have not even really thought about it. But time has continued to go on and I have gotten impatient with waiting. Last Friday I had a mini panic attack outside of the Trader Joes. I called Metrolina Christian to see what their enrollment was like for next year. They have one space in second grade and a short waiting list for kindergarten. I immediately thought, “Great! Now I have waited too long and this is not an option for us any longer.” I was in a small state of panic. I called Tom and we agree to apply to the school “just in case”. So much for patiently waiting. The one good thing that came out of this panic was that I realized how important it was for me that the kids go to a Christian school. Maybe it is because we had a such a wonderful experience at CDS and I don’t know any different. I may have the same experience at a public school. I don’t know.
All of this is to say that there are many unknowns in our life right now: Where are we going to live? Is anyone going to buy our house? Where are the kids going to school next year? Will we live in the country or right next to another house? So many questions…. all I know is that God told me to “wait”. I am waiting. And waiting. And waiting. If I think too long and hard about all of the options and unknowns then I will completely give myself a coronary. I have to put it in God’s hands and trust and know that He has it all under control. The other day a verse popped into my head that I had memorized 4-5 years ago. It is Philippians 4:4-6, “Do not be anxious about anything. But in everything, with prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”
I need that kind of peace. I am one of the most indecisive people I know. I have a hard time ordering from a large menu – so many things to consider: How much does it cost? Does it match what I want to drink? Is it healthy? Can I cook it at home? Arggghhhh! If I can’t decide on what I should eat then how can I decide which house to buy or where to send my kids to school?? Thankfully, God knows the answer to all of these questions. I just have to listen and take the baby steps that He tells me to take so that I can walk in the right direction.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6